


Let your fingers do the talking

by caterplina



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-05
Updated: 2017-05-05
Packaged: 2018-10-28 11:11:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10830084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caterplina/pseuds/caterplina
Summary: Taeyong really needs to start knocking.





	Let your fingers do the talking

**Author's Note:**

> I was thirsty for a fingering fic and Taeyong has nice fingers. /shrugs/
> 
> Unbeated.

Years seem like ages when it comes to Taeyong and Yuta’s friendship. They’ve been through the best and the worst together; they’ve seen the best and the worst of each other.

And the embarrassing, too.

Like that one time Taeyong walked in on Yuta masturbating. Up until this day, Yuta is glad that he was only watching porn and stroking his dick. If he had had his fingers inside himself, that would have been a different situation, and Yuta is scared of thinking that Taeyong could have had a different reaction.

That time, Taeyong had said a quiet _oops_ and closed the door. He didn’t even see what Yuta’s laptop screen was showing.

The first few days after the ‘incident’ were a mix of skirting around the subject, awkward glances (from Yuta to Taeyong) and some pretension of normality thrown in simple questions about meals, rest, TV, etc.

Until one day Taeyong looked at Yuta in the eye and said, “You know it’s cool, right?”

“Huh?”

“Masturbation is natural,” Taeyong told him. Only Taeyong could sound so chill, with a pink blush on his face.

“I know,” Yuta laughed. He felt a bit relieved that he was not the only one that could feel the awkwardness between them. “But it was an embarrassing moment for me.”

“I get it. Let’s just put this behind.” And Taeyong gave Yuta a smile that reached his eyes. There were remnants of the previous blush on his cheeks.

Like a hero in a story, Yuta feels like this is the moment when it all went wrong. It was that smile that stuck to Yuta’s mind for a long time. He knew he was fucked. He’d always known how handsome Taeyong was, he’d always known Taeyong had a very intense stare sometimes, and as his friend, he’d always known that Taeyong was actually as soft as a puppy. None of that had affected him in his daily life.

When he looks back to Taeyong’s smile that day and he remembers the flip in his belly, Yuta knows he’s fucked.

 

Yuta is telling Sicheng through Skype about his classes, while Sicheng tells him in broken korean about his re-adaptation to Zhejiang. From the kitchen come the sounds of pans and dishes as Taeyong makes dinner. The smell of kimchi fried rice permeates through the door and makes Yuta stop mid sentence and loudly sniff the air.

On the screen, Sicheng giggles. “What’s hyung cooking now?”

“You know?” Yuta sighs wistfully, leaning back on his chair and looking up at the ceiling. “When I moved in, I had no idea I was getting myself a housekeeper.”

“You also got yourself a crush.”

Sicheng’s words make Yuta lose balance and almost fall backwards, but he catches himself in time. He glares at his friend. “That’s it. I have dinner. I’m hanging up now.”

The last thing he sees is Sicheng’s eyes full of mirth laughing at him.

“Smells nice,” Yuta says stepping into the kitchen. Taeyong simply turns his head and smiles at him, before going back to serving the food. 

Yuta is in charge of the water and places a cold jar filled to the brim on the table at the same time Taeyong serves the last plate. When Taeyong walks to the sink to drop the dirty dishes, Yuta picks up his chopsticks and waits.

“You can start, you know.” Taeyong’s not facing him but Yuta can hear the smile in his voice.

“What you eat is not important but who you eat with,” Yuta replies cheekily, making Taeyong laugh.

As soon as they’re both sitting, Yuta digs into the food. It tastes as good as always. Taeyong has magical hands when it comes to the kitchen, though Yuta may be a little biased. Sicheng would laugh at him for moaning in pleasure when he takes the first bite. Taeyong blushes and looks down.

Yuta is fucked. 

There’s mindless chatter stopping silence from taking over their meal. Taeyong asks about Sicheng, fondly as an older brother would. Yuta tells him everything he’s talked about with Sicheng, save for the small detail of him mocking Yuta for his crush.

“I miss him,” Taeyong says in the end.

“Me too.” Yuta nods, looking down at his plate. “But I’ve got you.” And he grins.

Taeyong burst out laughing. He looks adorable, and Yuta is so smitten it gets too painful sometimes, the longing lodged inside his chest.

“I have to go to Doyoung’s tonight,” Taeyong tells him after dinner is over.

Yuta’s heart sinks. He knows it’s silly to feel this way, to see Doyoung as competition. Taeyong and him are great friends despite the bickering. He nods, pretending he’s not affected by it.

“He wanted someone to help him assemble the new bookcase and instead of asking someone else, I ended up being his emergency call.” There’s no need for Taeyong to explain all that to Yuta. But it doesn’t matter, not when Taeyong worries his lower lip with his eyes down.

“Is everything okay?” Yuta asks. He stops his walk to the sink.

“Huh?” Taeyong quickly lifts his head. “Yeah, yeah.” He nods.

That was strange.

“I… I think he likes me,” Taeyong says quietly.

Yuta was not expecting that, so he drops the dirty dishes in the sink and turns around to watch Taeyong carefully. He leans back against the counter, crossing his arms.

“Is there anything wrong with that?”

He can’t help but feel defensive. If Taeyong is right about that and rejects Doyoung’s feelings, then he’d probably do the same to Yuta. It hurts a lot to think about it. Yet he can’t tell Taeyong any of that, because then he’ll have to explain the reasons and his head hurts every time he thinks about confessing. So does his heart.

Yuta holds onto the counter. “How do you feel about him?” His heart is beating loudly in his chest. Maybe it was a mistake to uncross his arms; he needs to protect it.

“I… care for him. A lot. But it’s nothing romantic. It’s different but similar to how I care for Sicheng.”

“And me?” Yuta pouts, playing the kicked puppy card that always makes Taeyong chuckle softly, maybe shake his head, or smile fondly at him.

“Different.”

And his eyes are intense. It’s just one second before they go back to normal, but it’s enough for Yuta’s knees to go weak. He hopes Taeyong can’t see the way his arms tense as he tries to hold onto the counter.

“I gotta go now,” Taeyong says then, checking out his phone.

“Have fun! Work hard! Fighting!” Yuta tells him as Taeyong leaves the kitchen. A few minutes later, he hears the door closing. Then, he turns to the dirty dishes. He scrubs hard until they’re spotless and shining and there’s nothing else on his mind.

“Ahhh…” He sighs loudly when he heads back to his room.

There are two options: either he sleeps early and doesn’t wait to find out what time Taeyong gets home, or he stays up watching past World Cup highlights and waits until he hears the door closing again.

He picks the second option. But it doesn’t help distract him. He gives up right when Zinedine Zidane is scoring the first goal against Brazil in the final.

The other option ‒ the most tempting one ‒ is checking out the not-safe-for-work twitter accounts. He finds one of his favourites, that he doesn’t follow because he doesn’t really want to broadcast his interest to other curious eyes.

He finds a short video of two men, one of them with his fingers deep inside the other’s ass. Yuta swallows. He can feel the arousal dropping down and making his cock twitch inside his pants. The guy getting fingered is so loud; it seems like the other is doing a great job. Yuta starts palming himself over his pants right before the video ends.

Leaning back on the chair, he continues working himself up, tracing the shape of his cock as it swells inside his underwear making it feel too tight. He plays the video again and grabs himself, fabric draping over his cock. He looks down, but there’s no wet spot on it yet. He watches the video again as he strokes himself.

When he’s fully hard and panting, thighs tensing as he feels the arousal building up, he stops. He moves to the bed with shaky legs. He can feel the burn on the skin under his lips from the biting he had no idea he was doing.

Before lying on the bed, he undresses himself quickly, leaving only his white briefs. He sees the spot of precum and feels proud of it. Then, he grabs the lube from a box hidden under his bed.

Taeyong knows Yuta likes men; he’s okay with it. Taeyong is okay with almost anything, including Doyoung’s and Yuta’s sexualities. 

But one thing is knowing and saying it’s okay, and another is the reaction to an actual situation. Yuta hasn’t had a chance see it, nor he wants one. He’s said to Taeyong that he’s gay, but he’s never brought another guy home.

What would Taeyong say if he saw Yuta like this?

Yuta takes off his briefs and throws them aside. His cock bobs with the movement, leaves drops of precum on his stomach. He grabs the bottle of lube and squirts some on his fingers. After warming it up a bit, he traces his rim slowly. He doesn’t press on it; he lets the feathery touching build up the yearning. He only presses on his skin when he touches right under his balls. A shot of arousal pulls out a moan from him.

For such an impatient guy, Yuta likes to take his time doing this.

After teasing himself for a few minutes, he pushes the first finger in. It’s tight; he hasn’t done this in a while. He wiggles it a bit, takes it back and pushes in again. It’s not something he’ll ever get used to, the first breach. Stroking his cock helps him feel more comfortable. By the second finger, he’s back to being fully hard, and when he presses on the wall, the nerves make his arousal spike. His mouth falls open in a moan. He rubs the wall, clenches around his fingers. He moans a lot louder this time. All the while, his other hand stays fisting his cock, with precum layering his fingers.

He presses harder and cries out.

“Is everything‒?”

Taeyong stands at the door of Yuta’s bedroom, eyes popping out, question cut off.

They stare at each other for a few seconds, before Yuta reacts sitting up and covering himself with whatever he can find. He hisses when he pulls his fingers out of himself so fast, wincing, while Taeyong hides his face behind his hands.

“I’m so sorry,” Taeyong mumbles. “Sorry, sorry.”

Yuta groans, feeling his cock twitch beneath his pillow.

“Please, learn to knock!” Yuta whines.

“Yeah, sorry. I’ll… I’ll leave you to it.” Taeyong makes a move to close the door.

“I can’t anymore!” Yuta yells at him. “Really, Taeyong? Really?” He sighs.

“I’ll... yeah...”

When Taeyong steps back, Yuta barks at him. “No! You stay!”

Taeyong looks at him with wide eyes and deep red cheeks. “What?”

“Don’t look,” Yuta tells him before walking to put on a pair of shorts. “Take a seat,” he tells Taeyong afterwards, gesturing to his bed.

Taeyong hesitates, then sits on Yuta’s chair. Sighing, Yuta plops down on his bed. He’s about to rub his face when he remembers his dirty hands. He looks around to find the box of tissues, but it isn’t on his nightstand. The box falls on the bed, having been thrown by Taeyong. Yuta cleans his hands silently and throws the tissues towards the bin. He misses, and Taeyong grimaces but says nothing.

“House rules: always knock on the door. If I’m moaning or crying or whatever other noises you hear with my door closed, I probably have my fingers up my ass.”

Taeyong gasps at the crude words, but nods quickly.

“Why are you home so soon?” He asks then.

Taeyong scratches his chest, bringing Yuta’s attention to his hands. Even though his arousal is almost gone, it’s still simmering under his skin. The mortification of the situation was not enough for him. Taeyong’s fingers are really nice. They’ve always been, but Yuta’s always managed to stop himself from letting his thoughts wander.

“Jaehyun was there too,” Taeyong replies. “We did it easily. And I wanted to come back to get more rest.”

Yuta nods.

Taeyong looks at him and then looks down at his lap. Then, Yuta realizes he’s still shirtless. He looks around for his t-shirt but it’s on the chair, right behind a very shy Taeyong.

“Uhm… You didn’t hear me come in?”

Shaking his head, Yuta sighs. “No, I was busy and focused.”

The first time Taeyong walked in on Yuta, he was terribly embarrassed. This time, Yuta feels annoyed. He really was into it, enjoying his fingers inside of himself a little bit too much.

“Is it… Is that…?” Taeyong mumbles, but doesn’t finish his question.

“What?” Yuta snaps.

“Does it really feel that good?” Taeyong’s blush deepens. He bites his lips shyly.

For a moment, Yuta enjoys that it’s Taeyong who seems the most embarrassed out of both of them. “It does,” he says. Taeyong gapes at him silently, subtly nodding. It makes Yuta laugh. “What do you want me to say?” He shakes his head. “It feels great, amazing if done well.” Yuta stares straight at Taeyong. “And if done by another person, it’s probably the best orgasm for me.”

Taeyong gulps and breaks eye contact. “I see…”

“Why do you wanna know? Wanna try it yourself?” Yuta wiggles his eyebrows and it brings out a laugh from Taeyong, who throws Yuta’s t-shirt at him.

“No, I was just curious!” He says with a smile. Then, he stands up and heads to the door. “Sorry I walked in on you.” He looks genuinely apologetic, and that’s one of the things Yuta loves about Taeyong, how honest and caring he is, even about this sort of things.

“It’s cool. Just knock, really. Or don’t.” Yuta shrugs.

When Taeyong leaves the room, Yuta falls down on his back, bouncing on his mattress. He lets out a loud sigh. He starts to feel how sticky he is underneath his shorts and, when he looks down at his body, he sees the dry spot the precum has left. He walks to the bathroom to shower and clean himself. Hopefully, he’ll clean his mind too, since he’s thinking about Taeyong’s embarrassed smile as much as Taeyong’s fingers inside of him.

Some things shouldn’t even be considered.

It takes a few days for them to go back to normal. And this time, it’s mostly because of Taeyong, whose face turns red whenever he glances at Yuta. In those moments, Yuta smiles at him and simply waves wiggling his fingers. Taeyong whines or groans and walks away, with a smile of his own. 

Yuta feels relieved, after fearing that Taeyong would judge him for who or what he likes. He now knows that whatever Taeyong thinks about Yuta’s taste is not judgement. Sometimes, Taeyong’s eyes get lost and Yuta catches him staring at him. From the way Taeyong stares, head tilted, eyebrows furrowed, similar to the way he looks when he’s trying to understand something, Yuta can tell Taeyong is curious.

If Yuta were sensible, he wouldn’t let that affect him. But Yuta really is so fucked when it comes to Taeyong that his shown curiosity makes Yuta wonder when Taeyong will ask him about it again. He can’t stop himself from thinking of different scenarios and the possible consequences of the questions.

After the incident, Yuta touches himself only once, at night in bed, keeping himself quiet. He can only fist himself fast and come while biting his old t-shirt’s collar. The images going through his head as he quickens his pace all have Taeyong’s fingers and his dark eyes staring in wonder. Yuta would love for that to be real. He wipes himself afterwards, sighing at his damn imagination. 

Life has a way of surprising us. When we least expect it, a fantasy could come true. Maybe not in the way we imagined it, but in a similar way.

Like, Taeyong asking Yuta out of the blue while they watch a historical drama whether the prostate is equivalent of the g-spot in men.

Yuta chokes on his drink, splatters water all over the couch. Any other time, Taeyong would scold him, but right now he looks like a lost kid, ears deep, deep red in embarrassment. He looks adorable.

Coughing, Yuta shakes his head. “Yes. No. I don’t know… I don’t have a g-spot. I wouldn’t know.” He keeps coughing. “Why are you asking?”

Taeyong bites his lip shyly, passing Yuta some tissues to wipe his mouth and the couch with. “I was just…”

“Curious.”

Yuta stares at Taeyong, assessing how honest he is.

“I can’t describe it. It’s something you have to feel for yourself.”

Adorable, the way Taeyong nods, mouth barely open, as if Yuta were telling him something deeply serious. 

“If you want to try it, I can lend you lube,” Yuta tells him half-jokingly.

“I… I wouldn’t know how.” Taeyong’s hands are fidgeting on his lap, eyes down cast.

Yuta’s back snaps and he sits straight. “Oh my! Are you serious?”

“It’s just that you seemed to really enjoy it. After walking in on you, I realized how dumb I had been. Of course, you weren’t in pain.”

Taeyong’s confession makes Yuta’s cheeks feel warm. He doesn’t know how to reply to that. The TV keeps playing in the background, filling in for their silence.

Yuta gulps. “You’ve thought about it again?”

“Well… yeah,” Taeyong whispers so quietly Yuta wouldn’t have caught it if he hadn’t been so focused on Taeyong’s words, and mouth.

“What have you been thinking about?” His own voice drops low.

Taeyong’s ears turn red again. It would be adorable, if it weren’t for the fact that he’s just told Yuta he’s been thinking about it. ‘It’ being Yuta fingering himself. A feeling of pride mixed with arousal settles in Yuta’s belly.

He looks at Taeyong again and _fuck it_.

“I can teach you.”

This short sentence will be the cause of death for Yuta, he thinks as he sees Taeyong nodding awkwardly.

“Let’s uh… go to my room,” he suggests, standing up.

“Now?” Taeyong sits up straight, with wide eyes. He looks scared.

“Another time, if you want,” Yuta tells him, hiding his nerves by putting his hands inside the back pockets of his jeans and shrugging.

Taeyong shakes his head. “No, no. Now is fine.”

Yuta leads him to his bedroom, pace not matching his beating heart. He knows he seems a lot more calmer than he really is. He rubs his sweaty hands on his jeans and doesn’t look back at all to see if Taeyong is following him. He doesn’t need to; he can hear his steps.

“Uhm… sit down,” he tells Taeyong, who slowly turns around Yuta’s desk chair and sits.

Taeyong’s back is straight, fists on his lap, looking like a scared cat.

Yuta can’t help but laugh. “Relax! Don’t be so tense.” He shakes his head. “I’m the one that’s gonna be vulnerable here,” he tells Taeyong.

“Sorry,” Taeyong says, biting his lips, but letting his shoulders sag a bit.

“Better.”

There are some possible ways of starting it. Yuta thinks it’s best to dive right into it. He takes a deep breath and unzips his jeans and pulls them down, letting them pool around his feet. He’s not looking at Taeyong, but he does hear a quiet gasp. He wonders whether he should take off his t-shirt too, but he decides not to. He’d like to have a little protection from Taeyong’s eyes.

He sits on the side of his bed, facing Taeyong. He pulls out the bottle of lube from his bedside table, taking a shivery breath.

The situation is so strange that even if Yuta’s crush is there watching him, he doesn’t feel aroused. He feels so very nervous, he’s scared he might not be able to get hard.

“Oh god,” he whines, covering his face. “What are we doing?”

“I don’t know,” comes Taeyong’s muffled voice.

When Yuta looks up at him, he’s also covering his face. It’s so absurd he bursts out laughing. Taeyong slowly uncovers his eyes and starts giggling, until it becomes a full hearty laugh. Yuta shakes his head. Even if he has a crush on Taeyong, he’s still his friend first and foremost. They’ve been mostly comfortable with each other for so long. 

“Okay,” Yuta says, taking a big dramatic breath. He giggles again, while Taeyong shakes his head.

He leans back with his arms stretched. He’s shaking, whether it’s because of the laughter or his nerves, he doesn’t know. As he slowly spreads his legs, he sees the change in Taeyong’s eyes. Although Taeyong’s lips are still pulled at the corner, it soon changes. His eyes seem more intense and make chills run down Yuta’s spine. It’s a split second and the air between them transforms.

He can feel the effect of the stare in his groin. He feels his blood going down to his cock. He closes his eyes just so he doesn’t lose the feeling, distracted by the possible embarrassment. Then, he places his hand on his cock ‒ he hears Taeyong’s breath hitch ‒ and starts teasing himself over his boxers.

Doing it the same way he’s always done it, he focuses on his own touch, on the places that feel good. He sighs before squeezing his cock lightly. He pulls at it. It’s still mostly soft, but he doesn’t think it’ll take him too long to get hard.

When he feels that he’s ready, he opens his eyes and finds Taeyong’s dark ones staring straight at his groin. Then, Yuta pulls down his boxers and bares himself to Taeyong. It’s exhilarating, now that he’s fully hard. And he finds pleasure in the way Taeyong’s hands grip the seat under his thighs.

Slowly, Yuta teases his sensitive skin, sighing whenever he touches the right places. The noises he makes bring Taeyong’s attention to his face. That’s when embarrassment kicks in and Yuta forces himself to be quiet.

Taking the lube in hand, he pours some of it on his fingers.

“I have to… ah,” he tries to explain but he’s too impatient now and starts touching himself. “I have to warm it up first.”

“You didn’t…” Taeyong’s voice comes as a low whisper. It has an effect on Yuta’s cock that leaks a bit more of pre-cum.

“Mhm… I didn’t.” Yuta nods; then pushes the first finger inside himself. “Ah... “ He wiggles it, pulls out, pushes in. he does the usual moves that he enjoys. All the while Taeyong’s eyes stay on him. Now, Yuta can see how much bigger Taeyong’s bulge is inside his pants, and he licks his lip. He wishes he could see Taeyong’s own cock. He wishes Taeyong would stroke himself as Yuta pumps two fingers into himself.

He cries, loudly, when he touches his prostate. “There it is,” he tells Taeyong, who raises an eyebrow at him. “I- Ah! I’m touching it.”

It dawns on Taeyong and his eyes grow impossibly darker. He licks his lips. Yuta notices how one of his hands starts rubbing his clothed thigh.

“You can touch yourself in you want, Taeyong.”

Taeyong is startled for a few seconds, until he moves his hand to his crotch and rubs himself over his pants at the same time Yuta picks up the pace. Yuta brings his other hand to his cock, moaning when he pulls down the foreskin.

“Stop!” Taeyong says. And this time it’s him who startles Yuta, who lets go of his cock.

“What?”

“I… I want to do it.” He sounds so determined, as he stands up and walks closer to the bed. His pant look so tight around his bulge and it distracts Yuta for a moment.

“D-do what?”

“Lay down on the bed.” Suddenly, Taeyong’s voice sounds so sure and commanding, that Yuta can’t help but obey. His heart is beating wildly inside his chest. When Taeyong leans over him, after Yuta settled on his back, he feels turned on as never before. The way Taeyong crawls over him, running his hand up Yuta’s side pushing his t-shirt up, forces a deep moan out of him.

“Please, touch me,” Yuta whines.

“Let me.”

Taeyong grabs Yuta’s wrist and pulls his fingers out of him, leaving him empty and needy. “Please. Please.” Yuta’s hand falls by his side and he gives in to Taeyong.

Taeyong’s fingers run over Yuta’s thigh now. Yuta watches whining quietly, begging for him to hurry up. The soft touch tickles, and the sight of Taeyong’s long beautiful fingers is another image that will be stuck in Yuta’s head for a really long time.

“Should I… start with one finger or two?” Taeyong asks shyly.

Yuta chuckles, noticing that no matter how sexy Taeyong can be, he’s still the same caring and soft boy Yuta likes. “You can start with two,” he replies, bringing up one of his hands to caress Taeyong’s cheek.

“Gross,” Taeyong says with a smile. “You touched yourself with that hand.”

Yuta slaps him lightly. “You’re gonna put your fingers inside my ass. That’s worse.” When Taeyong makes weird face, Yuta holds his chin and makes him look him in the eye. “Hey, if you don’t want to do this, it’s okay. I can finish it myself.”

Shaking his head, Taeyong sets his eyes on him. “No, I want to… I want to make you feel good.”

“Oh god!” Yuta throws his head back against his pillow. “You’re going to kill me.” He closes his eyes and tries to regulate his breathing.

Suddenly, Taeyong’s fingers breach Yuta’s rim. Yuta hisses.

“Sorry. Too much?” Taeyong sounds unsure, but he doesn’t pull out.

Yuta shakes his head. “Keep going,” he breathes out.

The fingers inside of him pump the same way Yuta did it before, but without touching the walls. It’s building up his arousal again far too slowly. Yuta wiggles a bit, trying to get the fingers deeper inside of him. Taeyong’s other hand holds his waist and stops him. Yuta whines at him, pouting. But Taeyong merely chuckles and leans down to kiss the pout off his face.

The shock makes Yuta gasps and not kiss back. Taeyong pulls out, his fingers stopping the movement.

“Did I…?” His eyes are wide open in fear, as if he had overstepped. 

He makes the motion of pulling out, but Yuta grabs his head with his dirty, sticky hands and brings his face down to kiss him back. Feeling the sigh Taeyong releases inside his mouth makes Yuta smile. They kiss, deeply, with Taeyong’s fingers still inside Yuta, until the kiss turn too messy and Yuta whines for a bit more action.

“Curl your fingers,” he tells Taeyong when they separate. They’re both panting, and Taeyong’s hair looks like a mess.

Taeyong nods and follows Yuta’s words.

His fingertips are not quite in the right place, so Yuta moves a bit more. Taeyong seems to understand what he wants and, biting his lips, he tries to find the right spot. When he does so, Yuta moans and whispers a quiet _there_.

Taeyong’s mouth falls on Yuta’s neck, kissing and biting and licking, while his fingers softly rub his prostate. It’s too much, already feels like too much for Yuta. It’s too good. He wants to come; his cock is hard and his legs keeps wriggling.

“I’m close,” he tells to Taeyong’s hair.

Taeyong speeds up at the same time that Yuta grips his cock and strokes himself. He feels the tell tale pull in his groin. Everything tenses and he covers his hand and stomach in come, with a loud cry.

He’s left panting under Taeyong, whose fingers stay inside, until Yuta whines at him to pull out. “Too much.”

Taeyong leans back. He’s not the one who came, but he still looks like a mess, disheveled hair, flushed cheeks, dark wide eyes. It reminds Yuta that he didn’t make Taeyong come. He looks down to see that he’s still hard in his pants.

“Oh,” he says. For the first time, in a long time, Yuta doesn’t really know what to say. He doesn’t know how to offer to help Taeyong.

His friend looks down at himself. “Don’t worry,” he says. Then, he looks back up at Yuta. His eyes move between Yuta’s, as if searching for something. “Was it good?”

“Good?” Yuta smiles, with a pleased sigh. “It was amazing.” He closes his eyes.

He feels like he’s floating. His body’s almost limp, after releasing all the tension, all the embarrassment and all the arousal. Yuta was a mess of feelings ever since Taeyong walked in, but now, he feels completely liberated.

“Beautiful,” Taeyong whispers quietly.

Yuta’s eyes snap open and he sees Taeyong look shy, as if he wasn’t meant to say that out loud.

“Uhm…”

Taeyong moves back and gets off the bed, looking scared again. Yuta feels cold now, without Taeyong’s body over his. His t-shirt is rumpled over his chest and all of his lower body is exposed. Quickly, Yuta brings his legs together and sits up to cover himself, pulling down his t-shirt.

In front of him, Taeyong rubs his nape with his clean hand. The dirtied one is tense on his side, arm stretched.

“I’m… glad I could help you,” Taeyong tells him, before he quickly runs out.

Yuta opens his mouth to say something. He closes it, then hears Taeyong’s door close loudly. “Coward!” he yells and he plops back down on his bed. 

Dirty, sweaty, tired. Yuta sighs and goes to take a shower. Taeyong probably won’t leave his room at all today, or in the next few days.

As the water falls on his back, Yuta punches the wall softly, cursing at himself for letting things get out of control. He could lose his best friend because of a dumb decision made while he was horny. If the first two times that Taeyong walked in on him were awkward, this one will be the climax. The moment when the years of friendship are gone to waste. Yuta doesn’t let a sob escape his mouth, but he does rub his eyes harshly, trying to stop the tears.

Once he feels a bit better, he leaves the bathroom and gets changed. He could spend the rest of the night locked in his room, but he decides to watch TV in the living room. Although the program he’s watching is interesting, it doesn’t hold his attention as much as Taeyong’s closed door. He keeps glancing that way, hoping that Taeyong would come out.

He’s almost falling asleep, when he hears a soft click that alerts his senses.

Standing on the door of his room is Taeyong, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

In a flash, Yuta stands up. “We need to talk.”

Taeyong nods. He suddenly seems younger. Yuta realizes he’s changed his clothes and he’s drowning in his sweatshirt. He wants to draw him to his chest and hold him close.

“If you want, we can pretend this never happened,” Yuta says, as if it didn’t break his heart just thinking about that. “We can stay as friends, roommates. You’ll still be my best friend. You’ll still be straight.”

Nothing of what they did together is something straight guys do. But Taeyong’s scared and confused expression makes Yuta stay quiet about that. He looks down at his own hands, how they grip the hem of his t-shirt tightly. 

“I don’t want that,” Taeyong says quietly.

Yuta’s eyes snap back to him. “What?”

“I… I honestly don’t understand why. But I don’t want to forget that.”

“Taeyong…” Yuta warns him.

But Taeyong shakes his head. “I’ve…” He takes a deep breath. “I’ve been thinking differently about you for a while.”

_Different._

Yuta remembers the conversation in the kitchen they had a a few weeks ago and it clicks.

“Really?” He says it so quietly he can’t even hear himself over the loud beating of his heart in his ears. His belly is twisting with nerves. If this is all in his mind, if the signs he’s reading aren’t real, this will be the worst heartbreak of his life.

Taeyong doesn’t say it out loud but nods. They stay in silence, standing in the dark living room. The sound of the TV plays in the background and its light reflects on Taeyong’s face. This is the most vulnerable he’s ever looked in front of Yuta.

“Can I kiss you?” Yuta asks.

Again, Taeyong nods. Yuta is quick to step in front of him. Without saying a word, he presses their lips together. This kiss is so much more different from the one they shared back on Yuta’s bed. There’s no passion, but there’s the light, simmering feeling of the care they feel for each other. When Taeyong grips Yuta’s sides and pulls him closer, Yuta smiles, breaking the kiss. It’s a quiet sound, but Taeyong whines, and Yuta laughs.

“So…” Yuta says. “We don’t forget that it happened.” A nod. “What do we do then?”

“Do you… Can we… date?”

“You’re so not straight,” Yuta replies.

Taeyong makes a sound and shakes his head. “I’ve realized it only recently. It’s your fault.”

“Yeah, I’ll take the blame for that.” Yuta smiles and sees it reflected on Taeyong’s face. He leans in to kiss him again, but then he remembers. “What about Doyoung?”

“Mmm?” Taeyong’s got his eyes closed, waiting for the kiss. Then, he opens his eyes. “What about him?”

“Doesn’t he like you?”

Taeyong laughs as his arms curl around Yuta’s waist, bringing him even closer. “I saw him checking out Jaehyun’s ass, while we built the bookcase. Don’t worry about it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come talk to me on [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/caterplina).


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